I’m usually not a Monday hater, but you know your week isn’t off to such a great start when…

  • The microwave is broken, so you have to eat damp oats in milk for breakfast.
  • You decide to remedy your blah breakfast with a latte, but you forget your card and have to spend a ludicrous extra .60 to get soymilk.
  • You dump overpriced latte on the floor ten minutes later anyway.
  • Floor-latte somehow ends up in your space heater.
  • Your space heater no longer works, and you have no delicious hot drink. The office is sub-Arctic in temperature.
  • You go to the bathroom to get paper towels but leave your key card at your desk. You proceed to wait in the hall for 15 minutes until the next person comes to work and lets you back in.
  • Your work station smells overwhelming of coffee you cannot drink.

Are you sure I have to be here for eight more hours today?